


Answers

by angelboygabriel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Grace Kink, Happy Sex, M/M, Minor Angst, Orgasm Denial, bottom!Dean, s11 AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-26
Updated: 2017-05-26
Packaged: 2018-11-05 06:16:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11007696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelboygabriel/pseuds/angelboygabriel
Summary: Chuck has a lot to explain, but first Dean wants to know something. Is it really that bad to be... well, not straight?Of course Chuck answers the question, and the other one Dean didn't ask but always and never wanted answered. Does Castiel love him?





	Answers

**Author's Note:**

> S11 au where Chuck came back before Cas said yes to Lucifer. I haven't really written much casdean so please don't hurt me lmao.

It had been an idle question on an open invitation. (Do people really go to hell for being queer?)

 

Chuck gave Dean a mildly condescending yet fond look, and Dean could practically hear the “Oh, you humans!” in his look. Which, in retrospect, he probably could literally hear, because God and everything.

 

“I mean, if you don't want to answer, that's okay.” Dean added hastily and Chuck laughed. He'd never felt as insignificant in his entire life than when he was sitting across from the most powerful being in the universe, and Dean hoped to, well, God, he wouldn't be mad that he wanted to ask questions. Chuck turned a twinkling smile at him and grabbed Dean’s hand.

 

“Don't ever be afraid to ask me. Anything. Even if I don't answer, I hear it. And I'm in the flesh now, so it's only right you can ask me and actually get a response. So, I'll answer your question. You know that while I invented life and natural inanimate objects, humans invented things and concepts. Sexuality and gender are human concepts I had no hand in creating, therefore I do not believe in them. Angels do not have genders; they are the most basic and primordial compilations of pure energy and life. Neither do souls. Human attraction is based on a particularity towards one’s soul, not their body. Sure, bodies help, but they are only outward vessels of the soul so they're not the same. What goes on in your pants? That's random generation. And all that bullshit about me sending people to hell because they love someone of the same gender is idiotic and petulant because I never said that, Jesus never said that, and none of my angels ever said that. It was one of the historical inaccuracies of the Bible because of the prejudice of certain prophets.” Chuck finished, his hand still a calm warmth in Dean’s.

 

It should have been awkward, it  _ should have been, _ but Dean just felt safe and protected. Once Chuck dropped the whole self-preserving façade, Dean thought that he was something worth believing in.

 

“So in short, no, I don't think it's a sin to not be straight or cisgender.” Chuck added and gave Dean’s hand a small squeeze before the hunter stood up to leave.

 

“And Dean?” Chuck called after him before he left completely, and Dean turned around. “The other question. It's a yes.” he said and Dean stopped cold. How could he forget that Chuck could read minds, loud and clear?

 

“I know. I'm like his brother or something like that.” Dean responded and Chuck gave him an accusatory scowl. “Do I have to spell it out for you mortals every time? Castiel  _ loves  _ you, Dean. He loves you like your mother loved your father, and like Sam loved Jess and Gabriel loved Sam.” Chuck said flatly.

 

Dean was shocked and horrified. About Sam and Gabriel.

 

Well, that was a lie. He knew those two loved each other. If he lied to himself about what horrified him, maybe Chuck would say hey, it's a great cosmic joke! and it would go away-

 

“Playing denial doesn't change anything. I'm not pulling a ‘great cosmic joke’ on you. One would seriously think you'dve noticed!” Chuck commented on his thoughts, and Dean glared at the being as his stomach rolled. He felt sick and let on and lost. Dean started walking for the library, ignoring the retreating call of “Dean, wait!” from the kitchen. If the fucker wanted him, Chuck could snap him over.

 

It didn't happen.

 

*

 

Dean slammed his hands down on the long table in the library and promptly staved off the urge to bawl his eyes out and the closing of his throat. He fucking hurt.

 

He hadn't loved Castiel  _ like that _ for a while. For a good five years after meeting the angel, it was unwavering friendship, fractured brotherhood, and family. It still was, but these last three years Dean had lived with the fact he wanted more of Castiel. He wanted to kiss him, hold his hand, share those idiotic sappy looks couples did that he hated but secretly yearned for. And of course he wanted to have sex with him: that vessel was everything Dean liked in a guy down to a T. 

 

And now Chuck was saying that Castiel had reciprocated? Why didn't he  _ say  _ anything? 

 

God- Chuck- whoever, Dean just felt stupid. He looked up at the ceiling and let out a weak breath, closing his eyes as he finally let the angry, burning sadness permeate his whole body. At least Sam, Rowena, and Crowley weren't here. It was bad enough with Chuck; his presence and words. But that wasn't true- Chuck brought Dean a fucked up kind of comfort. 

 

“Castiel, I'm sorry.” he said to the quiet room. 

 

No fluttering wings. No hand on his shoulder. 

 

“You hurt me, Cas. I know you didn't mean to, but I just… I couldn't say anything. I can't. I stay alone with you in my thoughts at night, I cry alone to the image of your face. I'm always searching for you when you're not around and I… I need you, Castiel. I need you! I don't want to need you but I do and I can't stop the pain!” Dean yelled, his sadness morphing into anger. 

 

This time, the wings fluttered. One hand grabbed his shoulder, the other, his face. 

 

Castiel touched his cheek, brows furrowed, and Dean stifled a sob. He was crying. Why the fuck was he crying?

 

Castiel stared at Dean’s tears on his fingers like he was confused. “Why are you...?” he trailed off and Dean would be damned if the angel’s voice didn't waver with emotion as well. Dean gave a savage swipe across his face and turned away from Cas. He couldn't look him in the eye, not after what Chuck said.

 

“Why didn't you say anything, Castiel?” Dean said to the table. He could sense the angel a respectable distance away, could hear the cock of his head and the scrunch of I-don't-understand on that stupidly beguiling face. He finally turned around and stepped forward to face Cas squarely.

 

“Why didn't ever say you loved me, goddammit! Is it because I'm too broken and flawed for you? Is it because you can't associate with humans  _ like that?  _ I needed- need you to say you love me!” Dean finally screamed, and Castiel’s permanent steel resolve  _ shattered. _

 

“Because like you, I couldn’t! You ignorant… mortal! You don't know what it feels like to fall for something so insignificant in the grand scheme of my father’s creation. Dean, you are the moon. And I am the sun. The moon can reflect the sun, but can the sun reflect the moon? They can only eclipse each other. I can't tell you what you want to hear because I'm scared, Dean! I don't want you get hurt, angels and humans shouldn't be together. It's wrong!” He roared in return and Dean was taken aback by the force of the outburst. Castiel began stalking forward as Dean went opposite, hitting the table and leaning backwards on the hard wood, shoving the chairs to the side. Dean remembered too late what he was dealing with- how out of his depth he was- as Castiel shook his head and grabbed Dean’s leather jacket by the lapels.

 

“Oh, no you don't. Dean Henry Winchester, you are going to listen to me. You broke me. I had my wings ripped apart in every matter, in Hell, by my brethren, by the blade of my enemies. I did it, all of it, for you. I love Sam dearly but it's not what I feel for you, Dean. My father be damned, a son of God fell for a son of Adam. He read me the gospels, I knew I would fall for you-” his voice cracked and his hands started to shake from where he was gripping Dean’s coat, “and I tried to stop myself but I was a blind fool.” Castiel finished, and now he was crying too.

 

Dean had never seen Castiel cry.

 

And Dean couldn't take it. He jerked Castiel forward by the lapels of his trench coat and kissed him ferociously, harder than he had kissed anyone in his entire life. Dean kissed Castiel until the unyielding press of his body softened, until the angel’s arms wrapped around him, until salty tears flavored their lips. 

 

Dean kissed Castiel until he was gasping and asking for more, he kissed until Castiel crowded him all the way up on the table and hiked him up on it below the thighs. They kissed until Dean’s hips were rocking forwards incessantly and Castiel’s trench coat was on the ground, and then they weren't kissing. Castiel transported them into Dean’s bedroom in the blink of an eye, and the hunter all but tackled the angel to the bed. 

 

Dean straddled Castiel’s hips, silent as he methodically unbuttoned his shirt and undid his tie. Castiel’s hands flew up to undo Dean’s layers too, and once they were both bare on top, they were kissing again, Dean surging down to Castiel’s mouth with a mission. They moved and kicked legs out until they were comfortably lined up, Dean splayed out over Cas with the angel’s legs locked around his waist. For awhile, all they did was kiss and explore each other with their mouths, low moans thickening the air of the room. 

 

“I wanted you for so long…” Dean breathed into his mouth, watching as Castiel’s cheerfully blue eyes went gauzy and blown. 

 

“And I, you.” he responded and dropped his legs from around Dean’s waist. He pushed Dean to the side of the bed and rolled on top, earning a glare from Dean. “Listen, just because we’re banging doesn't mean I'm gonna bottom- ohfuckmaybeonce.“ Dean rushed out as Castiel brought a hand between them, deftly unbuckling Dean’s belt and rubbing him through his jeans as the hunter did the same to Cas, both of them wriggling out of pants and boxers. Castiel’s slacks got tangled around his legs and he flat out growled. 

 

It was just the right amount of unsexy that Dean laughed out loud: it was so very  _ Cas  _ to get stuck with his pants around his ankles and an impressive hard on that Dean couldn't help it. Cas frowned and managed them off, kicking them away before crawling back over Dean.

 

“Why are you laughing?” Castiel asked as he rocked his hips forward, punching a snickering groan from Dean. “Because…” Dean said, wrapping his arms around Castiel’s shoulders, “this is fun. It's good. Sex is supposed to be nice-feeling for everyone and light spirited. I've been doing it for the sheer sport of it before now, and you just… make it so much better. Happy sex is a legit thing, man.” Dean explained and Castiel broke out into a smile. 

 

Castiel snapped up a bottle of lube from nowhere, methodically coating his hand as Dean watched, mouth partly open. “Well, it's my pleasure to give you happy sex, Dean. Your soul is quite attractive.“ Castiel responded calmly as his hand lowered behind Dean’s erection and around his hole. Dean’s mouth moved wordlessly, unable to respond to the shitty pun as Castiel pressed one finger in, crooking it gently. 

 

“Cas!” Dean gasped and lifted his hips up as Castiel continued his slow strokes. Gradually, a second finger worked its way into the next one and Dean began hissed a little, the new invasion feeling a little weird and a lot good. With the third finger, Castiel found Dean’s prostate and the Winchester writhed, a snarly “Castiel…” being torn off his lips. 

 

Castiel stilled at the moan of his full name, staring at the human beneath him; flushed and painfully hard, thrusting against his hand. 

 

“Say that again.” Castiel demanded and Dean looked at him like he was crazy, but with the right twist of his hand Castiel ripped a howl of “Fuck, Castiel!” from Dean. 

 

“It’s like a prayer.” Castiel said reverently as he looked down at Dean, looking already wrecked and pretty on his fingers. 

 

“I don't care what is sounds like,“ Dean said with a wince as he guided Castiel’s digits out of him and wrapped Castiel’s hand around his vessel’s cock, his own hand covering Cas’s. “I just want you to fuck me. Please. To hell with my pride.” Dean said and Castiel smirked, lowering himself down Dean’s body to line up with his hole.

 

“I don't want to hurt you.“ Castiel mumbled as he began to edge forward, pressing against Dean. The hunter got a good grip on his hair and yanked, and all the sudden he was fully seated in Dean, the both of them yelling out at the sensation. 

 

Dean’s back arched off the bed and he grabbed the sheets, his eyes wide as he stared at Castiel. The angel met the look head-on as he slowly drew his hips back before thrusting back in. Dean’s hands dug into his bare shoulders. 

 

“You can't break me, Castiel,” he huffed, “Hell knows we've waited.” he added with a groan as Castiel rolled his hips at a glacial pace. It was drawn out and lava-hot, and simply not enough. Dean got a handful of Castiel’s ass with an immature snicker and pretty much pulled the angel into him, getting a grunt from Cas at Dean’s actions. 

 

“So you want to play,  _ boy?”  _ Castiel growled before slamming back in so hard Dean thought his teeth rattled. Dean’s eyes rolled back in his head and he gave a loud moan as Castiel’s next thrust hit his prostate and nearly pushed him up the bed. Dean’s toes curled into the sheets to try and counter the overwhelming pleasure as Castiel set a steady pace, and Dean was positive Castiel was about to crush the mattress with how much exertion it seemed to take in order to hold him up as he fucked the hunter. 

 

“Mmm,  _ yeah,  _ Cas, yes, please, more…” Dean grunted and moved to meet his thrusts. One the third push back of Dean’s hips to Castiel’s, he felt his stomach start to clench and he rolled his head on the pillow. 

 

“Cas, Cas, harder,” he managed before one of his hands from Castiel’s shoulder began to venture down to jerk off his aching cock. He was so hard it hurt, but Castiel stopped moving completely and grabbed Dean’s wrist. 

 

“No, Dean.” he snarled, watching those emerald eyes go wide, “the only thing you're gonna come on is me inside you.” he growled and Dean bit back a moan. One of the hands pressing into the bed moved to Dean’s shoulder, and Castiel’s hand perfectly fit over the already existing print. All the breath left Dean’s lungs as Castiel’s hand squeezed his shoulder and he bottomed out again with a shared groan. Cas picked his pace back up again and began to hit Dean’s prostate every other stroke or so. Dean began sweating bullets when he felt a small tendril of Grace course through his blood, and somehow he knew he would literally be unable to come without Castiel’s permission. 

 

“Cas, please, oh fuck, let me come.” he sobbed and Castiel just gave a raspy laugh. “Good humans  _ wait _ for their angels to come.” he countered and Dean's legs fell from Castiel’s waist he was shaking so hard. Dean’s mouth dropped open and he helplessly pushed back on every thrust, his brain so lust-addled that the only thing he could speak was a garbled version of “Castiel” and “please.”

 

Finally, the angel's hips began to stutter and he seized up, coming hard with a long groan of Dean’s name. His grace lifted, and Dean came a moment after, literally screaming Castiel’s name as he melted into the bed. 

 

Castiel pulled out and rolled over to his side, smiling as Dean quietly bitched about his ass before spooning him from behind. 

 

“Wow. Jesus, that was… wow.” Dean said, voice sounding sore.

  
The last thing he heard before drifting off was “Jesus had nothing to do with our fornification.”


End file.
